its been a while,how are you

not that I care or anything,just thought Id make a bit of conversation.
When you dont see somone for a while,the first thing that you say is how are you.
well....IF YOU WERE THAT BOTHERED YOUD HAVE CALLED ONCE IN A WHILE!!!!you fuck.

there we go.Im back,havent seen you lot in ages though how are you all?

good morning world

How much did you all miss me.If I dont get at least one response Im going to terminate this blog.
I mean it now.dont push me,Im a woman on the edge.

Top Ten Reasons For Being Scared of Clocks

1. They have sinister ticking noises that remind you of the passing of time.
2. You're nver going to get that second back and you wasted it. Tick, tick, tick...
3. They foil my plans for a lie-in every single day.
4. They make me sleepy.
5. They feature heavily in scary paintings by Salvdor Dali.
6. They feature heavily in daily life.
8. They are really mechanical dictators that exert a control over every single person on the planet.
9. They think we're suckers!
10. They weild all this power.

lucky week!

Ivew had the best week for money I got overpaid by over £150 by my employers then the bank made a monumental fuck up and my account now stands at £2532.40

fellow staff

introducing
the team
hazy mc shaven:terminally ill with the flu,sneezes in my direction seventeen times an hour,always moans about being ill and takes time off every couple of days to reflect on the possibility of a fatal common cold virus.
Hand of misery:the miserable old bitch who sits next to me.lucky for me she's to fucking old and stupid to know how to use the internet,otherwise she may one day stumble accross me calling her a miserable whining fuckwit.
Dizabell:INSANLEY posh and ditzy,funny to a point,then just grating and annoying after that.the point being about thiry two nano seconds into conversation.
silent witness:never speaks........ever
TWAT:self explanatory.peers at me over his pc moniter..I have no idea what he looks like from the cheekbones down, and no desire to find out.
roo "the belly" drunk:biggest beer belly Ive ever seen rests it on the table and leers at me.
bollocks to this shit.

stupid customer enquiries

"good morning thankyou for calling ************ youre speaking to kirsty-anne today how can I help?"

following is a list of stupid responses to this question

"Im the director of a big company!I demands to speak to somone who's more on my own level of intelligence!!!"(I placed my headset on the team mascot, a bagpuss toy.....and left it there)

"I want to speak to somone about my problems"
the number you require is the smaritans,fuck off and leave me alone

"youre company is a shambles!!"
"you dont need to explain this to me I work here"

"hello I think this is the wrong number"
"you better hope it is coz if youve brought somthing off us,youve fucked it"

"hello I spoke to somone earlier"
"okay?"
"Id like to speak to them again"
"do you have a name?"
"no"
well we have roughly 20'000 employees would you like to just guess?"

and the best one yet!
"hi there Im calling from uuuhhh...ummm...oh shit I cant remember where Im calling from....can you help me?"

"PARDON?"